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Sunday, April 8, 2012

Sheep Movie Review: Wrath of the Titans

A decade after his heroic defeat of the monstrous Kraken, Perseus-the demigod son of Zeus-is attempting to live a quieter life as a village fisherman and the sole parent to his 10-year old son, Helius. Meanwhile, a struggle for supremacy rages between the gods and the Titans. Dangerously weakened by humanity's lack of devotion, the gods are losing control of the imprisoned Titans and their ferocious leader, Kronos, father of the long-ruling brothers Zeus, Hades and Poseidon. Perseus cannot ignore his true calling when Hades, along with Zeus' godly son, Ares (Edgar Ramírez), switch loyalty and make a deal with Kronos to capture Zeus. The Titans' strength grows stronger as Zeus' remaining godly powers are siphoned... -- (C) Warner Bros.

Wrath of the Titans was so close to being a good movie, but it just missed the mark with me. There were scenes that blew me away with their special effects and wonderfully-timed remarks by the characters, but all the other stuff was kind of dumb and boring. My 10 year old daughter, who loved John Carter, noticed that the Warrior Queen Andromeda was wearing earrings into battle and thought if she couldn't wear earrings during a soccer game then Andromeda shouldn't be wearing them while going to war. She kind of has a point, but I think the important thing is a 10 year old was bored enough to notice earrings.

lava throwing goodness!

But I am really funny in this part

smexy bad boy Ares
The premise was a good one. A long time ago…in a galaxy, wait. Once upon a time…no, that’s not it. Before the dawn of man, Kronos was imprisoned in Tartarus by his sons Zeus, Poseidon and Hades using their unique weapons: the trident, pitchfork and bolt. Well, turns out Zeus’ son Ares (Edgar Ramirez), the God of War, has serious daddy issues and teams up with Hades, who has serious brother issues, to release Kronos. Kronos is one badass of a creature, made of earth and can sling lava with his hands. He was one of my favorite characters and his escape and destruction near the end of the film was one of the best visual parts of the movie, even if it did drag on a bit. Perseus teams up with Poseidon’s son Agenor (Demi-gods, activate!) and Queen Andromeda to go into Tartarus and save Zeus, who is being drained of power to free Kronos. They free him, but Kronos has already broken out of his prison. Zeus and Hades make up and help fight Kronos. Perseus and Ares don’t, and with the help of Helios, Perseus’s son, Perseus kills Ares. Which really was a shame, 'cause he was pretty hot; even though he was a back-stabbing jealous diva. Notice I haven’t mentioned Poseiden? That is because he dies and not only that, they kill Zeus too! Can you say no more sequels? Liam Neeson can.

see the Hasselhoffness?
Perseus, Sam Worthington, was kind of a disappointment in this film. In Clash of the Titans he was super cool and sexy, in this one he was kind of Hasselhoffish in appearance and acting ability. Agenor, played by Toby Kebbell, was fabulous and the source of most of the humor. I also didn’t buy the attraction between Andromeda and Perseus. He is burying his wife in the beginning of the movie and making kissy face with Andromeda at the end. The creatures they did have in the movie were pretty horrific, and I mean that in a good way, but the Cyclopes acted like the three stooges (which I won’t be seeing by the way). I could have used more evil creatures and less daddy and son issues.

End of Spoilers
I think they could have taken all the really awesome parts and made a kick-ass 30 minute movie I would give 5 Sheep to. Instead, there was dorky dialogue and scenes scattered throughout, making it worth renting, but you will be kicking yourself if you pay 3-D or IMAX prices. If you want to see all the cool stuff check out the website.

3 angry colossal Sheep


  1. I'll wait for the dvd but glad there was at least some decent man candy bits! Better review here then I've been seeing at some, glad you got something out of it. :)

  2. Now, who thought it was a good idea to make a sequel? Hahaha

    1. i don't know...if wasn't as if the first one made tons of money...someone must have owed a favor ;)

    2. Disney's animated Hercules is a better story. LOL

    3. true, but the man candy was better in Titans ;) and sometimes that is all that matters!