Plot:
The brutal and bloodthirsty King Hyperion (Mickey Rourke) and his murderous Heraklion army are rampaging across Greece in search of the long lost Bow of Epirus. With the invincible Bow, the king will be able to overthrow the Gods of Olympus and become the undisputed master of his world. With ruthless efficiency, Hyperion and his legions destroy everything in their wake, and it seems nothing will stop the evil king's mission. As village after village is obliterated, a stonemason named Theseus (Henry Cavill) vows to avenge the death of his mother in one of Hyperion's raids. When Theseus meets the Sybelline Oracle, Phaedra (Freida Pinto), her disturbing visions of the young man's future convince her that he is the key to stopping the destruction. With her help, Theseus assembles a small band of followers and embraces his destiny in a final desperate battle for the future of humanity.
I'm going to start with the negatives in my review. I personally felt that so much CGI was used in this film it was more like watching a long video game instead of a movie. At the same time the effects left quite a bit to be desired; most of the movie takes place in barren landscapes containing no vegetation. It's a wonder these folks had any food to eat at all, unless they survive on dirt and rocks. The plot itself just lacked the ability to get the audience emotionally invested. The script gives the film an overall hollow feeling when audiences are supposed to feel invested in the main characters struggles and triumphs. There were also a couple of things that strained my belief. Frida's character is supposed to be a virgin oracle (please tell me why they always have to be virgins?) and while the men are running around filthy she's always runway gorgeous with perfect clothing. It's just totally unrealistic for the type of journey out in the sticks upon which these folks are supposedly going. Either way director Singh is a talented visual artist but where his career will end up taking him is yet to be seen.
The positives, shirtless men! Whips and chains may excite me but flaming whips? Not so much. Yes, indeed you get a nice range of hottie totties walking around without shirts but frankly a few more could have been added to the movie. Never enough eye candy. Henry does some amazing stunt work which is undeniably incredible, and there's plenty of hard hitting action with Luke and Mickey bringing up the rear. I wasn't too impressed with Luke in the recent Three Musketeers remake but his acting as the Greek God Zeus brought him back into high standings in my book. Bloody battles are waged between men and gods which help to keep the audiences entertained where the script left holes. Mickey Rourke brings the BAD as our main evil overlord adding some well earned "ewww's" you wont want to miss. Really, you can't help but hate the creepy guy which earns him a big 'shirts off salute' for superb delivery of the character.
Henry and Mickey get the stand out awards for their roles in Immortals. It's a puffed up movie but sure to entertain those looking for a mindless fun popcorn flick.
Getting 3 "butting kicking Athena" Sheep
KD
