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Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Sheep Movie Review: The Purge

The Purge (2013)
R, 1 hr. 25 min.
Genre: Horror, Sci-Fi, Thriler
Directed By: James DeMonaco
Stars: Ethan Hawke, Lena Headey, Max Burkholder
Universal Pictures
If on one night every year, you could commit any crime without facing consequences, what would you do? In The Purge, a speculative thriller that follows one family over the course of a single night, four people will be tested to see how far they will go to protect themselves when the vicious outside world breaks into their home. In an America wracked by crime and overcrowded prisons, the government has sanctioned an annual 12-hour period in which any and all criminal activity-includingmurder-becomes legal. The police can't be called. Hospitals suspend help. It's one night when the citizenry regulates itself without thought of punishment. On this night plagued by violence and an epidemic of crime, one family wrestles with the decision of who they will become when a stranger comes knocking. When an intruder breaks into James Sandin's (Ethan Hawke) gated community during the yearly lockdown, he begins a sequence of events that threatens to tear a family apart. Now, it is up to James, his wife, Mary (Lena Headey), and their kids to make it through the night without turning into the monsters from whom they hide. 
“Just think of all the good the purge does.”

Well it sure as hell didn't do any good for me. After spending the last 85 minutes of my life regretting the second I handed over my $4.25 for the ticket, I've come to a conclusion: If given the choice between seeing this movie again or actually being in The Purge completely unarmed in the middle of the ghetto, I'd choose the ghetto. Simply for the fact that it'd be less painful.

The movie starts out good and had the potential to be a really good thriller. It quickly declined though. The actors are lackluster and B list at best. The plot line is overly thought out and what should have taken at most 30 minutes, got spread out for an hour and a half.

If you were to play a drinking game while watching this movie (props for sneaking in booze!) and every time someone said or mentioned the word “'purge” you'd be dead within the first 20 minutes. We get it okay, this night's a big deal, no need to restate that.

The so called “unfortunate events” that lead to the family's horrible night aren't bad luck at all, they're the result of bad parenting and child supervision. The movie tries to prove a message (a down fall for any horror movie) and depicts American's as blood thirsty insane savages.

Not only does it play up every over used cliche available, but the movie is physically upsetting. I don't mean upsetting as in disturbing or morbid, but upsetting as in the movie is so bad that you literally cringe. All the wrong people die and all the wrong people live! The “plot twist” isn't a twist at all. I saw it coming within the first 10 minutes.

The only good part was when the mom finally snaps, claiming she just wants some "mother f****** peace!"

In conclusion; boyfriends are bad news, neighbors are bad news, doing good deeds are bad news and crazy psycho people in masks are most definitely bad news.

Do yourself a favor, save your time, money and sanity and do as they do in the movie, JUST STAY THE FLOCK HOME!

1/2 "Purged" Sheep

Guest reviewer: Ren Stogner


  1. Thanks for the warning! And the link to the squirrel mask....

  2. I had a feeling it was going to be pretty bad :(

  3. LOL Thanks for letting us know. I'll wait until it's out on tv for free.

  4. Glad i read I will save my money and keep my brain cells

  5. LOL my son saw this the other night and said the best thing about the movie was the mom's comment as well. Other than that he said wait for video if you really want to see it. That is too bad I had high hopes, but have to say so far the best thing about this movie so far is your review, which definitely made me smile :)

    1. She is my daughter, of course she her reviews are good ;) she has a review of the book Curtains coming up soon. It is a humorous look at the funeral home business

  6. This is a great review! I see the ads in the subway and was curious about it (though I'm not into thrillers myself). I'm definitely staying away from it!