GtPGKogPYT4p61R1biicqBXsUzo" /> Google+ Guest Post: White Rabbit from Shards of the Glass Slipper by Roy A. Mauritsen | I Smell Sheep

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Guest Post: White Rabbit from Shards of the Glass Slipper by Roy A. Mauritsen

Fantasy author Roy A. Mauritsen made the mistake of making one of the villains, White Rabbit from his book, write the guest post. Rabbit has a nasty disposition, but Roy makes up for it with a sweet giveaway at the end.


"Rabbit, you have to write a guest post for me." He said. "I'm busy writing the next novel for Shards of the Glass Slipper, I don't have time." he said. "So I'm delegating."

"No." I answered. "You are the author, you write your own guest posts," I said. "I'm still trying to get a war started. You'll make me late. I'm late enough as it is."


"You are under contract to promote the book you are in." He waved papers in my face. "I wrote you so... so you have to do what I say," he said.

"Actually Lewis Carroll wrote me... you don't own me."

"Alice in Wonderland is public domain. So suck it. You are in my book now, you have to help promote. It's for the I smell sheep website. Very nice people I met at Concarolinas, that convention in Charlotte, North Carolina?"

Like I pay attention to what conventions he goes to.
"I'm not from around here." I remind him. "I don't know what a north carolina is. Is there an east carolina?"


"I dunno," he answers. "Is there an east Wonderland? Stop playing dumb! I write you a lot smarter than you are."

"Get someone else! What about General Snow White? Or the weird blonde girl with the bears. What about that beanstalk guy, Jack?"

"Jack's busy in Wonderland trying to- uh... he's busy."

"Aha! So Jack IS in Wonderland? What's he doing there?"

"Nevermind that! That's in the next book. Stop trying to get plot details you aren't supposed to know. The point is, they are too busy dealing with the shit you started. I could get Queen Alice, then," he suggested. "Maybe your girlfriend will write the guest post?"

"Really? And she's not busy? I need her around, she doesn't have time to write a guest post for you, you know that. You're writing that story. And she's NOT my girl!"
I knew it was a hollow threat.


"Fine if I you don't do this guest post... I'm killing you in the next book, how's that?"
That was not a hollow threat.


"You can't do that, you know I'm supposed to kill Queen Alice."

"Are you? I haven't written that scene yet. Maybe your plan to kill Alice gets thwarted? At the last minute, perhaps?" He smiled upper-handedly.


"Impossible! It's a foolproof plan, already in motion." I looked at him; even I could feel the anger simmering in my own eyes. Do you feel that? I thought. That's me wiping that smug smile off your face with my sword. He stared back, no, he was not bluffing. He was an asshole, but he was also the author of the book I was in. I'm sure I'm not the only fictional character that begrudged, if not outright hated their author. But in that moment I believed he'd kill me off, before I had the chance to make good on my plans to institute a new ruler for Wonderland.
"Fur and whiskers! Fine. I'll write your stupid guest post!" I relented. "This is blackmail."


"It's legally binding contractual persuasion."

"I'll probably write it better than you could anyway."

"Great! Thanks! You're the best, Rabbit!" He smiled and then bounded back into his writing office.

And here I sit. Tapping about desk. Instant writer's block.
"Tell them about the book!" I hear the muffled shout from behind the closed door. 
In due time, but first, the readers deserve a proper introduction.


I am the White Rabbit, royal liaison for Queen Alice of Wonderland for the past 300 years. Roy Mauritsen is the author of the book I'm in, Shards Of The Glass Slipper, Book I: Queen Cinder. Unlike the popular fairy tale stories you may know, these characters (I for example am not the cute and cuddly little rabbit in the Tenniel illustrations, for starters I am much taller) are not the Disney princesses
you might have known. The premise of Shards Of The Glass Slipper is sophomorically simple- a group of fairy tale characters led by General Snow White and her dwarven resistance army attempt to thwart the evil queen
before she starts a war with Wonderland. Cinderella has grown up to become the evil queen, so they say. But really she's just trying to keep the kingdom together. Totally understandable from my point of view. Just because
she's influenced by her stepmother to become a witch and gain more magical power, doesn't make her an evil person in my book. Just like my plans to kill Alice are for the betterment of all of Wonderland doesn't make the white rabbit evil, right? Anyway, the book interweaves an ensemble cast of well over a dozen fairy tale characters... and blah, blah, blah it has a bunch of fairy tale characters in it and it billed as... what's the term? Epic fantasy fairy tale adventure. These blurbs are ridiculous. 


-"Lord of the Rings meets Brothers Grimm" some Patrick Thomas author guy. 

-"....A worthy writer with real talent AND a unique vision, a combination rare and important." - Janet Morris, author of Beyond Sanctuary & The Sacred Band.
Eh, what does she know? And this one. 

-"Fantastic... A Magnificent Epic!" -Sarah Beth Durst, author of Into The Wild & Drink, Slay, Love.
Seriously, that's what other "real" authors are saying about his book? Between you and me, I've tried to read the book. Honestly, except for the scenes that I am in, it's not very good. I couldn't get through it; it's not really my thing. Even if it was, it's horribly written; too many characters and all that. Chances are you already are familiar with the fairy tale
characters in the book, just so he doesn't have to make up his own new characters... seems like lazy writing to me.

"I don't even know why anyone would publish this!" I yell over my shoulder. "Maybe you should stick to your day job as a graphic artist!"


"People like the book" he shouts back from behind the safety of his closed door. "It's pretty well written. It's gotten over twenty five-star reviews on Amazon! Plus, shows like Once Upon A Time and a bunch of Hollywood movie related to fairy tales that are coming out, it's all pretty popular these days."

He's probably in there, writing stuff for his Shards Of The Glass Slipper Facebook page or his @roymauritsen twitter account claiming to be writing his next novel. I bet he hasn't even started it yet. The only other note he has here is that the book is published by a small press called Padwolf publishing. Suckers, that they would publish such dreck, I say. Their site is padwolf.com. It's on amazon.com too and this thing called goodreads.com. Oh, and his all too self-important website shardsoftheglassslipper.com. I prefer to read books that are actually printed on paper, which you can order that, or if you are one of "those people" who do that disgusting e-book fad, you can get it for your stupid Kindle too.

And a piece of advice to any authors out there who might be reading this- never let the villain of your book write your guest post.- Roy A. Mauritsen



Shards of the Glass Slipper: Queen Cinder(Shards of the Glass Slipper #1)
by Roy A. Mauritsen
One Last Chance To Save Happily Ever After! Can a group of heroes, including Goldenhair, Red Riding Hood, and Rapunzel, help General Snow White and her dwarven resistance fighters defeat the tyrannical Queen Cinderella? And will they succeed before a war with Wonderland destroys everything? Their only hope to stop Cinderella's quest for power lies with a young girl named Patience Muffet. She carries the fabled shards of Cinderella's glass slippers, as well as the dark secret of who murdered the last of the fairy godmothers. Roy A.Mauritsen's fantasy adventure fairy tale epic begins with Shards of the Glass Slipper: Queen Cinder.



Book #2 to be released this year


About the Author:
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It was bound to happen, with pictures being worth what they are in words, that a successful creative artist would eventually entertain the idea of writing a novel. Roy's interests were somewhat atypical as a child. Aside from art and science, there were books and movies--science fiction and fantasy themed--and also role-playing games like Dungeons & Dragons, and a love of fairy tales that started at an early age with a dusty, 1941 hardcover edition of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. Exploring every creative avenue available to him, Roy took every art class he could in school, and also any writing class, especially creative writing. Roy has received several awards in recognition of his artwork. But for this artist-turned-writer, the saying "a picture is worth a thousand words" wasn't enough this time. There was a story to be told, and it demanded to be written. This fairy tale epic fantasy adventure is also the inspiration for Shards, a concept album that Roy collaborated on and the fourth studio release by the band Gene Pool Zombie.
Roy has also somehow managed to have a successful career as a digital artist and graphic designer, and also designing book covers and TV commercials. When he's not trying to figure out how that happened, he enjoys photography, volleyball, SCUBA diving, and traveling. But most of the time, he works on 3D artwork, writing short stories for upcoming anthologies, and working on the follow up to Shards of the Glass Slipper. Roy lives on Long Island, New York, with his wife, Caren, and their dog, a Newfoundland mix named Coda.


GIVEAWAY!



What you will win:
1. Signed paperback of the novel 
2. CD of professionally recorded and mastered orginal songs by Gene Pool Zombies inspired by the book.


a Rafflecopter giveaway


24 comments:

  1. Congrats on your first book! It's different than what I usually read, but you got me hooked and I would really like to try it. Messing with fairy tales "happy ever after" could be interesting.

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  2. Hmm...I'm intrigued. This sounds like an interesting read.
    As for a fairy tale character I'd like to meet...any of them, I guess. I've really never thought about it.
    Thanks :-)
    Lori

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  3. This sounds very interesting. I would love to read this book. As for a fairy tale character I would like to meet...I think I'd like to meet the prince from The Twelve Dancing Princesses. I'd also like to meet the Big Bad Wolf. I thoroughly enjoyed the post. Thanks for the giveaway. michelle_willms@yahoo.com

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  4. Love the review! Their world from the perspective of one of the characters is really cool! I think I will read this book.

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  5. I would also like to read this interesting book. As for fairy tale characters - I would like to meet the elves who helped the shoemaker. I would love to wake up to a sparkling clean house every morning. I would of course leave food and clothes at the end year. (LOL) rabbit.eyes3@yahoo.com

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  6. Congratulations on the publication of Shards of the Glass Slipper! It sounds like a fascinating book. Interesting post from the White Rabbit. Because I enjoy romantic fairy tales, I would love to meet the prince from Sleeping Beauty. Thanks for the great giveaway.

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  7. Is there any fairy tale character I'd like to meet? Gerda, from The Snow Queen!

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  8. Some of my characters don't like me either. You'll have to watch your back now -- The White Rabbit WILL get even!

    Congrats on your fantasy series and new release!

    Fairy tale character I'd like to meet? The Golden Goose. It could free-range happily ever after with my chickens.

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  9. Oh I am so down with meeting General Snow White - WOW! This is a new (to me) read and I am rubbing my hands together wanting to get hold of that gorgeous cover and dive inside. Thank you so much for sharing this treat with us, I must meet the White Rabbit :)

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  10. This book looks fantastic! Also, I'd want to meet a fairy godmother. I think they would have some great stories to tell!

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  11. I would love to read this book. I would love to meet Belle and the Beast. Thanks for the giveaway.

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  12. Thanks,everyone for your wonderful comments! I hope you will have a chance to enjoy my efforts! This was a lot of fun for me to share! :)
    Good luck to all involved on the giveaway!

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  13. Congrats on the books cant wait to read them they sound very different but very interesting

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  14. With fairy tales taking a modern twist, I am very eager to see how authors take what used to be and adapt them to what their worlds are like. My favorite types of princesses are the ones that can stand up for themselves and have fight. That's why I'm excited to read your book. It has a great sounding plot and I very much like the twist of Cinderella being power hungry. Congrats on your book!

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    1. Thank you! I Hope you will like it! :)

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  15. Congratulations on your first book! I would love to meet so many different magical creatures, such as dragons, fae, elves, and nymphs!

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  16. I'd like to meet Alice and the rabbit. We'd share small cakes and fall down holes. I'd also like to meet The Princess and her pea. I'd shove her off that mattress. I need a nap.
    I was in a punk band (80's) and we did a really great version of WHITE RABBIT. I was also the rabbit in theater years ago when we did AIW.

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  17. Snow White - we are both interested in geology and gemology, we like to keep things neat and tidy, and every girl would love to hang out with 7 men that look like the guys from Duck Dynasty in a small cottage in the forest

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  18. I can't wait to read this book. I'd like to meet Beast

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  19. hmmmm..that would be Rapunzel :D

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  20. I think I would like to meet Sleeping Beauty!
    nurse_mommy(at)live(dot)com

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