GtPGKogPYT4p61R1biicqBXsUzo" /> Google+ Larry Weiner (Paradise Rot: The Island Trilogy book #1) explains "Murder Tarp" + giveaway | I Smell Sheep

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Larry Weiner (Paradise Rot: The Island Trilogy book #1) explains "Murder Tarp" + giveaway

Since writing a trilogy in which undead are rendered dead again, I became fascinated with how pedestrian killing can be. Also, there was a scene in the movie "Heat" in which someone opens a trunk to reveal a tarp taped to the insides and I thought, "that's a murder tarp!" I started imagining how many people go to Home Depot to get tools that might be used for nefarious purposes. Seemed kinda funny to me. That plus I'm a fan of Dexter. - Larry Weiner


We’re going to move right past the ethical issues surrounding package removal because we’re sociopaths and professionals. If you feel the need to ponder your decision to involve yourself in package removal, then this blog’s not for you. The practical advice given here is to create what is known as Habeas Corpus .

I’m (redacted) and I’m the owner/operator of Murder Tarp, the “clearing house for tips, suggestions, recipes and deals on disposing unwanted items®”
Like us and learn practical advice on Facebook:
And follow us on Twitter: @murdertarp
Right now, follow this twitter link: #Uline as it carries an extraordinary selection of chemical resistant rubber gloves.)

I’ve been asked to focus on one particular tip from our plethora of advice when disposing of a package. I considered a variety of options ranging from where to purchase the best chemical solvents (Istanbul) to the best bone saw (G3 Bonesaw but given today’s often time sensitive options I thought it best to talk about the old school—never fails—murder tarp.

It’s our moniker for many reasons; chief among them, practicality and ease of purchase and you can’t be prosecuted for using the word “murder” in your business name.

The market is flooded with all manner of tarpaulin. Let’s break it down.

Tarps come in a variety of materials such as polyethylene, canvas and vinyl. The material is usually woven for strength and is classified simply as “regular duty,” “heavy duty,” and so on. Grommet size is universal, though they are classified by strength and are manufactured from different metals such as aluminum and stainless steel.

The tarp materials used are as follows:

Polyethylene: It’s a laminate. It’s waterproof. Reacts well to UV light. If non-UV treated, it’s a nightmare. It becomes brittle and loses its wrapping and waterproofing strength if exposed to sunlight. This relates to grave excavation not covered in this blog. It should go without saying that fluid seepage is often the first indicator of a disposed package, which most animals find attractive.

Canvas: Not 100% waterproof. Use only in time sensitive operations.

Vinyl: This is the big gun. It’s oil, acid, grease, mildew and water resistant and have a high tear strength. The only downside? They come in two colors, yellow and brown. Go with the brown. Speaking of color, manufacturers have created a color system to indicate thickness.

Blue: 5-6 mils thick
Yellow: 7-8 mils thick
Green: 9-10 mils thick
Silver: 11-12 mils thick
Brown: 16 mils thick

Generally speaking, tarp sizes are all over the map. Be aware that the stated tarp size is five percent smaller than advertised, thus a 20 ft. x 20 ft. tarp is actually 19 ft. x 19 ft.

The greater the count, the more resistant to tearing. 8 – 12 per square inch. TIP: Never cut a tarp, as it will compromise the woven strength factor.

That’s it. Pretty basic and practical.

Now that you have a guide to the best murder tarp, you’re ready to dispose of the unwanted package. However, just because you have the right materials doesn’t mean you know how to use them. For information on how to properly wrap a package and updates on sales and other package related tips, refer to our Facebook page:

Paradise Rot (The Island Trilogy book #1)
by Larry Weiner
Genre: Satire/Dark Comedy
Publisher: Booktrope
May 30, 2015
ISBN: 978-1-5137-0031-1
Number of pages: 211
Cover Artist: Larry Weiner
Kyle Brightman—late of the advertising industry and soon-to-be-late of the 5th floor psych ward—has a job offer he can’t refuse. A new resort in the Caribbean is looking for an art director.

Kyle soon finds himself on the Isle of St. Agrippina working alongside a beautiful copywriter with an icy handshake. Questions arise: Why does the resort management team sport spray-on tans in the Bahamas? How can the resort offer such cheap vacation packages? What does one do with vats of Astroglide?

To get the answers, Kyle must first navigate a series of wildly unpredictable events with a cast of even more wildly unpredictable characters, including a seductress jungle assassin, her partially paralyzed talking Chihuahua, an Ivy League Rastafarian seaplane captain, Kyle’s ex-psych ward roommate, a former Haliburton mercenary, and a French tavern owner with a fondness for goats, all set to the greatest hits of the 70’s. Pablo Cruise never felt so right.

About the Author:
Larry Weiner is the author of PARADISE ROT (BOOK ONE), ONCE AGAIN, WITH BLOOD (BOOK TWO) and the forthcoming HINDU SEX ALIENS (BOOK THREE) that make up the Island Trilogy. Larry earned a degree in film from CSULA and was an award-winning art director. He lives on an island in the Pacific Northwest with his wife, two kids and a gaggle of animals. He plays bass and thus has poor hearing.


2 ebook copies of Paradise Rot 2 paperback copies of Paradise Rot


  1. Hee Hee! I had such a blast reading this and reading the book!

  2. I look forward to reading this book.

  3. I'd enter this giveaway but I already own (and love) this book! More, please, Larry Weiner!

  4. I love that cover! Sounds like a good read!! Thanks for the chance