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Saturday, May 24, 2014

Guest Post: Five Superpowers I Wouldn’t Want To Wake Up With Tomorrow by AshleyRose Sullivan

Five Superpowers I Wouldn't Want To Wake Up With Tomorrow

Awesome Jones is all about two people navigating life, love, and dinner in a superhero world. And those scenes, the quiet ones, are the ones I enjoy writing most. But, I also love coming up with superheroes who populate Awesome’s world. Consequently, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about superpowers and what I’d do if I suddenly woke up with one. Not all superpowers are that great, some would make life terrible. With that thought in mind, here are:

1- Ridiculous Super Scream
Marvel’s Black Bolt had a voice so crazy powerful that chatting up the pretty girl in the coffee shop could level the city. He’s spent his life mastering control over his voice. The man doesn’t even talk in his sleep. I could never do this. Five minutes into this power and nothing would be left standing.

2- Super Hearing
Absolutely not. Loud noises already give me enough trouble. If I could hear a fly rubbing its wings together on the other side of the house, I’d go off the deep end.

3- Invisibility
I admit, this power could be (and in comics is) pretty handy. But, this is me we’re talking about and I’m highly likely to forget that I’m invisible and end up walking into traffic and ruining everyone’s day.

4- Communicate With Animals
When I was a kid I really wanted this power. Then I grew up and realized I probably don’t actually want to hear about what some bird thinks about the squirrel in the next tree over. I hate listening to my neighbor’s yard-dwelling terriers constant barking, I don’t think it’d be any better if I just heard them screaming, “I’m bored! I’m bored! I’m bored! A squirrel! I’m bored!” all day. Anyway, I hate having conversations with humans, animals aren’t going to be any better.

5- Temperature Reduction
Nope. I would never use this. It’s literally 100 degrees as I write this and I’m wearing a flannel shirt. This power would be completely wasted on me.

Do you guys agree with her? Is there a superpower you wouldn't want to have?

The only thing Awesome Jones wants is to be a superhero. Until he falls in love.

Despite his colorful name, Awesome Jones is a painfully average man who dreams of being a superhero, just like the ones who patrol his city. It’s been that way since he was a little boy, raised by his grandfather after his parents’ death.

The day Jones starts his new job as a file clerk at Akai Printing Company he meets secretary Lona Chang and everything changes. Lona sees something in Jones that no one ever has and the two quickly become inseparable. But when the perfect pair’s domestic bliss is threatened by a super-powered secret from the past, Awesome Jones has to make a choice. He must decide whether he should play it safe or find the strength to live up to his name and risk everything he’s come to love to save the day like he always dreamed.

This superhero novel is more than just a comic book in prose—it’s a fairytale for adults.
About the Author:
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Born and raised in Appalachia, AshleyRose Sullivan has a BS in Anthropology and an MFA in Creative Writing. She lives, writes and paints in Los Angeles with her husband and their many imaginary friends.


  1. lol, I actually really like this list of superpowers NOT to have. I think I'd add turn things to ice though. I hate the cold.

  2. I don't think I'd want superhearing or X-ray vision. It's better off we don't hear what other people are saying about us--and do we really want to see what's under most people's clothes? Eww!

    1. Oooo! got a point there. I guess mind reading would fall into that category too unless you can turn it on and off at will.

  3. I always used to say I wish the cats could talk, but now I have a very chatty cat and I realiza all I would hear would be feed me, feed me, oooh the laser toy, feed me, wake up, wake up and feed me, mom, mom mom she touched me, pet me, not there! feed me.

    Super hearing without reverse hearing aids would make attending anything impossible. Weddings with bands, no way. Clubs: not that I go anyway, but agh! Even my Junior League meetings would be impossible.

    1. exactly! Be careful what you wish for with superpowers...the cat would probably have a condescending tone too